Lucy has a wild sense of style. Our little city has a very recognizable woman. I've always assumed she was homeless, but don't know for sure. I've seen her many places, often arguing with people, etc. She wears really outrageous outfits - lots of animal prints, feathers, I think maybe those carnival roach clips in her hair. We saw her at the library last weekend and Lucy whispered to me, "Mommy, isn't she BEAUTIFUL!" My jeans and black tshirts must be really disappointing.
Warrior princess in tree pose.
The girl can be pretty kick ass. She yells at neighborhood bullies if they try to mess with her brother. She attacks that same brother even though he is double her size. She loves so intensely that she grits her teeth when she hugs. She sings little made up songs when she thinks no one else is listening.
And yet there is this need in her that I worry about filling. Because, good Lord, does she ever need me. Some phases are better than others, but I feel overwhelmed by it right now. I weaned her last year thinking that it might help abate this some. Nope, not so much. I worry that somehow she knows that I didn't want to be pregnant with her and that it took weeks (months?) for me to bond with her. I took good care of her (I take really good care of other people's babies). I want to fill up this need I sense with great big buckets of love.
